


Overgrowing your past

by simpleillusion



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, I probably need a beta, M/M, Mates, future!fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-05
Updated: 2013-06-05
Packaged: 2017-12-14 02:07:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/831477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simpleillusion/pseuds/simpleillusion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles just graduated college and is coming home. Derek and the pack aren't very welcoming because of events that happened between Derek and Stiles before his departure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Overgrowing your past

Graduation creeped on Stiles somewhat unexpectedly. He had obviously been aware of the concept, as an unavoidable consequence of attending college, but he still wasn't prepared for it to actually happen, and definitely not so soon. It was always just something that was too far away to dwell on it, and then there were finals and papers and who would have time to think about it? It wasn't that he didn't want to get out of school and start his life already...Okay, yeah, maybe it was that a tiny little bit. But not entirely. He left Beacon Hill four years ago to obtain a degree in English literature and was home barely twice since that time. He knew his dad was hurt by that, and he really, really was sorry about that. Hurting his that was the last thing he wanted to do ever, but being in Beacon Hills was just so damn _difficult_ since his departure. He always was a fan of avoiding problems, which turned out to be kind of a hassle since he had a natural talent at attracting them. And it wasn't like he could just tell his dad exactly why was he avoiding his home town, even if Sheriff was mostly in the known those days. There are things you just don't tell your parent, no matter how good your relationship is. It's an unspoken rule to preserve peoples sanity. Sheriff didn't exactly approve of his son running around chased by all imaginable supernatural beings either, especially since sometimes it was because said son thought it would be fun to poke them with a stick, but him and Stiles both preferred when neither of them had to lie. And Stiles will forever swear the poking was just an accident and seriously how was he supposed to know? So Stiles kept his distance during his college career, but now with a freshly printed diploma in his hand he didn't have an excuse to hide anymore, he didn't feel the need to either. He wanted to come back, he wanted to be back right where he left off, but he wasn't sure he still had what to come back to.

*

 

Stiles absolutely hated packing. It was like a thing from his nightmares, tiny suitcases chasing after him and all that stuff. He sucked at it majorly, always forgetting something important or bringing twice as much as necessary of something else, once he ended up with a whole bag of socks but no more than two t-shirts for an entire week. Also he was sure there was something supernatural about the way all his suitcases seemed to shrink when he tried to pack them again, when returning home, because it was physically impossible to fit everything in, even though it had been right there before. They really should look into that some time. 

He had no idea how people like Alice not only didn't suck at this but actually were capable of putting everything in just the right places to make their suitcases look so neat and well organized. Stiles was almost certain she gets applauded on the airports when they're x-raying it because there was no way anyone would not appreciate this. He groaned in frustration at the sight of his roommate's masterpiece and thrown himself on the top of her bad with dramatic whine 'I give up. I'm staying here forever so I don't ever have to pack'

Stiles met Alice in first year of college in sociology class, when they got paired up for a project. They quickly bonded over their shared love for comic books and Mario cart, the latter almost causing spectacular failure of the entire assignment. Thank good for long nights and endless amounts of coffee. In they second year they decided to get an apartment together along with their mutual friend Adam, simply because they were all fed up with dorm life, especially Stiles whose roommate reminded him strongly of coach Finstock and that was not something he could ever overcome, even if the guy was actually really nice. Which he was. Stiles felt really bad about it.

Alice shot him an amused glare from the floor, where she was sitting. 'And how will you ever pay rent all by yourself?'

Stiles snorted 'Duh, I'll get new roommates. You are not as irreplaceable as you think'

'That's a lie and you know it' She sing songed standing up 'Now if you get your ass of my bed I might be persuaded to take pity on you and help.'

Stiles have never moved faster in his life.

 

*

His goodbye with Alice and Adam was far from teary or sentimental. In a way he loved them, they had been his closest friends during those four years and he's going to do everything in his power to stay in touch with them, because he is that sort of person who doesn't let go of people he cares about easily, but the closer it gets to leaving the more restless he becomes, vibrating with the need to come back home, where probably he won't be welcomed by a parade, but he prefers to stay optimistic and believe he can make everything right. If only Derek will give him a chance.

*

The flight to Beacon Hills wasn't very long, In fact Stiles found himself wishing it lasted longer. Much, much longer, preferably forever, so he never has to actually get out there. Maybe they would let him stay at the airport, he could totally live there, there was wi-fi and everything, he could be perfectly happy, and Erica would never find him with her red painted claws. On the other hand it might not be such a bad idea to let her vivisect him before he has to talk to Derek. Although she probably wouldn't want to do him any favors. He asked his father to come pick him up though, so he abandoned the idea of staying forever and with last longing look at the safety of this establishment went to look for him. 

Stiles didn't let go of his father for good fifteen minutes after he found him, clinging to him like he hadn't since he was twelve. People were looking at them funny, when passing by to get to their cars or looking for taxis. He really didn't care, he hadn't been able to do that for way to long to care about anybody's opinion. Sheriff didn't protest, not much anyway. He patted his son's back and let him cling as long as he wanted. 

'Alright, we can go now' Stiles announced cheerily when finally letting abruptly go of his father and skipping to the car. Sheriff huffed in amusement and followed his long not seen son.

'How was your flight?'

'Uncomfortable' Stile summed it up shortly. 'So, how are things?' He tried to sound nonchalant. Judging by the look on his fathers face he didn't succeed yet again.

'Good'

'Just good? Seriously, dad, that all you are giving me?' He would have thought at least his dad would be on his side, and willing to cooperate.

'Nothing big happened lately and you now the rest is not my business. You're gonna have to ask them yourself.'

Stiles scoffed, but couldn't find any argument to push the topic further, it was true after all, pack always kept to themselves reaching for outsiders help only when absolutely necessary. It might be easier for them to come to Sheriff now that he had helped them in the past and proved himself trustworthy, but that didn't yet mean they would run to him to cry on his shoulder, or whatever it is that werewolves do when they want to share feelings. Probably cry tears of acid. He could totally imagine Erica with acid dripping out of her eyes. Or Lydia. He shuddered at the image, his dad casting a curious look at him. He didn't come back to the subject anymore, choosing to catch up with his dad for real, ranting about school and graduation Sheriff couldn't attend because of his work duties. They obviously had talked a lot when Stiles was away, probably way more than when he was actually around. Mostly because Sheriff became his only link to home, since beside him Stiles only talked to Scott sometimes, and even these conversations were short and tensed, Scott not so subtly hiding things from his best friend. Stiles knew that he doesn't want to and how guilty he felt about it so he didn't blame him, there are things that no werewolf can overcome. Whatever. He's fine on his own. His dad let him talk only occasionally making acknowledging sounds to assure Stiles he was still listening, even when he was talking about stuff he already told him over the phone or Skype. He knew his son, and the easiest way to keep him happy was to let him talk when he felt the need to talk. Which was quite often, but what wouldn't man do for his offspring.

*

It was good to be in this room again, all of childhood memories coming back all at once. It gave Stiles a worm feeling of safety, like nothing could possibly hurt him under his father's roof. Even if he knew better than most people how untrue that was. Everything here was exactly like he left it, with posters of bands hanging on the walls and stash of old comic books in a corner, now covered in dust. Here it was like he never left. His train of thoughts was interrupted by a quiet knocking on his window. He turned around quickly, silently pondering on how much he missed this sound without even realizing it. Scott slipped swiftly inside as soon as Stiles unlocked the window, and crushed him into enthusiastic hug that Stiles reciprocated with as much force as he could manage. He really did miss this. Even if it was starting to hurt a little after a while.

'Hey there buddy, you gonna have to let go' He informed Scott warmly patting his head in a gesture he knew Scott hated, but Stiles secretly loved. It made the trick, Scott let him go with a suggestion of a whine forming somewhere in his throat, but finally allowing Stiles' lungs to expand and breath once again. 

'I missed you. You never come back' Scott whined looking at him accusatory. 

Stiles sighed. 'You know why.' He looked away from the werewolf busing himself with unpacking. He knew Scott was making his sad, puppy eyes at him right about now, and he really didn't like to be at the receiving end of those. Somehow he never managed to grow accustomed to how sad Scott could look if he wanted to. He didn't need a reminder of how guilty he should feel, he was quite certain there was people that were going to make sure he knew that very thoroughly in less friendly manner. 'And you know I missed you too. All of you, even if they hate me now.'

Scott looked pained 'Nobody hates you, Stiles.'

'Yeah' He laughed humorlessly 'You are the only one who still talks to me.'

'Allison does too' Scott supplied helpfully, and Stiles really smiled at that,some things never change.'And the rest... they don't hate you, they just don't understand.'

'You are a werewolf too, and somehow you get it, right? So why can't they?' He usually didn't let himself get angry about it, didn't let himself start blaming people for how hurt he got by the whole thing, he knew it was pointless. They blame him, he blames them, nothing ever get better in a circle of mutual blaming, where probably everybody is equally as right as they are wrong. So he tried not to. It's just that sometimes he cannot any longer. So he gets pissed and takes it out on some poor character in a video game or runs until it goes away again.  
Yeah. I do. But maybe that's because Derek wasn't my alpha at first, maybe they feel it stronger. I mean it's hard for me to understand sometimes too. When the wolf's side becomes stronger on the full moons or something. It's harder then. To get it.'

Stiles stared at him wordlessly for some time, before he sighed.

'Do you think he can forgive me?' He asked quietly

'Of course. That's the whole point.' Scott said with a certainty that gave Stiles some hope, so he smiled at his friend's eager face.

'Do you want to go for coffee with me and Allison?' Scott offered 'I thought you would like to look around the town.'

'Sure.' Stiles agreed easily, even though part of him wanted to hide inside the house forever, so he doesn't have to face anybody. But hey, you've got to start somewhere.

*

It was surprisingly nice to see Allison again. Stiles hadn't been particularly fond of her when he was leaving, as her crazy episode still wasn't completely out of his memory, and maybe clouded his opinion about her being right for Scott. But now that seems unimportant somehow. He was just happy to meet up with somebody who didn't think he was the worst person to walk the earth. He didn't even feel so much as a third wheel as he used to feel every time they were together in the past. Scott was looking at his girlfriend as dreamily as ever, but his longing after his best friend won this time and he was actually listening to what Stiles had to say instead of zoning out thinking about something Allison-related. And she was just like Stiles remembered her, all sweet smiles and kind words, one would never expect what she was capable of if given a bow and right motivation.

Obviously his peace couldn't last too long. Universe was very much against Stiles Stilinski ever being bored. He was in mid-ramble about one of the most memorable parties in his college career, when coffee shop doors opened and Isaac ventured inside. He stopped mid-tracks as soon as he spotted Stiles and they stared at each other in silent for few seconds before Isaac moved to stand right beside the table they were sitting and hissed 'What are _you_ doing here?'

Stiles gulped uneasy. He always thought Isaac would be the one that didn't hate him all that much. 

'Hello to you too' He answered with fake cheerfulness, perfectly aware of the fact everybody knows exactly how fake it was, by the beating of his heart. 'Long time no see, missed you too buddy. I would love to catch up...' 

'Stiles' Isaac interrupted him loudly 'What are you doing here?'

'I live here, remember? Sheriff's son?'

'That didn't seem to mean that when you were leaving, did it?' 

'I went to college, not Siberia' He answered a little irritated with where this conversation was going.'You were the ones that shut me off.'

Isaac sneered at him, but before he could said anything Scott stood up and put a hand on Isaac's shoulder. 'That's enough. We should go, we are supposed to be at Derek's in like fifteen minutes.'

Isaac leveled him with a heavy stare. 'And you thought it would be a good idea to go to his house smelling like this?' 

Scott rolled his eyes. 'He would find out soon enough anyway.'

Isaac looked like he wanted to argue some more but he let Scott push him outside without a fight.

Stiles looked at Allison who was still sitting drinking her coffee a little awkwardly. 

'Aren't you going with them?' He asked her eventually. She shook her head.

'No. Derek still prefers when I'm not there for pack meetings.' She explained, wincing a little. 'I mean he doesn't protest when I do come, but you know' She shrugged.

'Yeah.' He agreed and they sat for few minutes in silence, before he burst in humorless laugh, which made Allison sent him a questioning look. 'Don't worry, he's gonna like you more now, that I'm here.' 

'It's gonna be fine.' She said reassuringly. 'You are staying now, right? 

Stiles shrugged. 'Yeah, I guess. If things work out.' 

She gave him a determined nod and he saw in her eyes the flash of that hard look that used to occupy the all the time, in the days. Somehow he found it very reassuring. 'They will'

*

They spend almost whole day together, after leaving the coffee shop, Allison took him on a tour around the town to show him everything that changed. There wasn't much. Beacon Hills was, and always been, one of those little towns that never really change. Maybe a house will get repainted or one of the shops will get closed and another one will take it's place but in general? In general everything is exactly the same as it was, no matter how long you are gone. It was still nice, to walk around those streets he sometimes felt like he completely forgot, with a friend to remind him he's really home. 

The walk put him in much better mood , so when he finally returned home the incident in the cafe was almost completely vanished from his mind. He most certainly did not expect Derek Hale sitting on his bed, waiting. 

Stiles opened his bedroom door and almost tripped over backing away in surprise when he a saw Derek looking at him from the bed. 

'Jesus. Do you really have to do that?' Stiles asked when he steadied himself.

'Why are you here Stiles?' Derek asked ignoring the question. 'And why are you hanging out with my beta?' 

'Did you all forget I actually live here? Jesus Christ, you act like I moved to another planet with no return ticket. And Scott is my friend. You can't expect me to not see him at all' 

Derek eyes flashed red. He looked pissed, but he usually looked like that, so it was hard to tell sometimes.

'Yes I can. I'm his alpha.'

'Oh, of course. I've noticed, you know.' Stiles was angry too, and really that was not have he wanted his conversation with Derek to go 'After all you all hate me.'

'Stay away from my pack' Derek said, leaping out of the window, before Stiles managed to say another word. 

Stiles was mad at himself for letting him leave like that. All he wanted, all he planned to do was talking to Derek, getting him to _forgive_ him, and all he managed was to make him even more mad at him. Truth be told Stiles was never good at that, he knew how to talk sure, no problem and as long as you want, but actual talking? When he was supposed to say something important? Not so much. He hid himself behind his words and jokes and rarely let people really see him. This time he was determined to make it right, and he still blew it. He sighed deciding he would try again tomorrow. Maybe Derek will listen before throwing him out.

 

*

He did as he planned, hopping into his old jeep the following morning. He was ecstatic to find out his dad still kept in the garage. Sheriff told him he didn't have the heart to get rid of it knowing how much Stiles loved it, even though he was seriously concerned about safety of driving that thing. Stiles didn't see a problem, it was working, starting up almost every time he tried, he was proud of his girl after everything they've been through together. He decided to drive to Derek early in the morning hoping to catch him alone, without any additional pack member to deal with. It could be too much for him to handle in one go. Everybody always told him to pace himself, and hey, he's finally listening to them.

He made his way to the Hale house many times before, but never it seemed so long. He looked at the speedometer and saw he was driving slower then he ever remembered before, even when he wasn't actually allowed to drive. Huh, maybe that was the reason the road seemed do long then. 

He pushed the gas pedal harder trying to calm himself down at the same time. 'Jesus, he's not going to kill me.' He muttered to himself. 'Probably'.

He wasn't surprised to see Derek was already standing on the porch when he pulled up in front of the house. He wished he wouldn't, some additional time to gather up his courage would be nice, but he wasn't surprised he didn't get it. He stumbled out of the jeep eying the house appreciatively. Derek started renovating it before he left, after complaining for good few months that his apartment was constantly swarming with teenagers, but Stiles never got to see final result. It turned out better then he expected, it seemed _cozy_ somehow, but at the same time like it belonged right were it was, in the middle of the woods. It made him want to see insides, but talking his way inside might not be that easy judging by the expression Derek was sprouting. 

'Um, hi' Stiles started awkwardly. 

'You shouldn't come here.' Derek answered with a glare that used to make Stiles fear for his life back in the days. Okay, maybe still did a little bit.

'I just want do talk. You didn't really give me chance yesterday.'

'There's nothing to talk about.'

'Really, Derek? Really?'

'Yes' He turned around to wander back into the house.

'Look I get that you are pissed at me.' Stiles tried again a little desperately. 'I really get that, but you never even bothered to get _me_.' 

Derek snorted turning back to look at Stiles his eyes red,

'What's there to get? You didn't want it, it was quite clear.'

'Yeah, no. I wanted it.'

Derek frowned at his, red slipping out of his eyes as he calmed himself down, he looked confused.

'You said no.'

'I said not now. I was barely eighteen.'

'So I was just supposed to wait around until you're done looking for better options?' He's angry again. Stiles marvels at his amazing skills in always pissing off werewolves. Really he's amazing in this shit.

'No. But you didn't even listen. You just made all my friends hate me.' He says bitterly. ''I couldn't even come back to see my dad without them harassing me.'

'That's a pack thing. I didn't tell them to do that.' Derek actually does look guilty for a second, before his face returns to the default angry expression.

'I know. That's not the point.' 

'What is the point, Stiles? Why are you here?'

'Because I want to. I wanted to than, and I still want to now.'

'You left. You chose to leave.'

'I was eighteen. I wanted to go to college, do something.' He stopped exasperated 'I don't regret leaving' He says quietly 'I regret loosing you, all of you. I always planned on coming back. But I had to... I had to for a little bit, just so I wouldn't feel like I'm sacrificing everything.'

'That's what my pack was to you? Sacrifice?' Derek spat out.

'No! For god's sake, Derek!' He ran his hand through his hair calming himself 'If I didn't go it would always be a regret waiting at the back of my head, I would never be able to make a real choice. I'm not a werewolf, I don't feel things the way you do. I needed that time' 

Derek was silent after that, looking at the boy in front of him with unreadable expression. Stiles didn't expect much words, but _something_ would be nice. This silence was making him really uncomfortable really quickly.

'Please Derek' He tries again 'I never meant to just leave you all behind, I could never do that.'

'It's not possible Stiles.' Derek finally spoke. He looked frustrated now 'I can't have you in my pack, I can't have my betas hanging out with you. It's... You should understand that.' 

'I would, but I stand by the fact I didn't actually say no.' 

'Stiles...' He didn't finish tilting his head as if he was listening to something Stiles couldn't hear. It looked kind of adorable when werewolves did that. Not that he would ever tell them that, he would probably end up with several bite wounds that would be very hard to explain in the hospital.

'You should go' Derek said turning to look at him again 'Our training begins soon.'

Stiles paled 'They are all driving here right now aren't they? Derek nodded stiffly 'I'm so screwed' 

'Just go Stiles'

Stiles decided to not argue on that any more, leaping to his car in hope to escape before the whole pack arrives. He was definitely not ready to face their combined hatred towards him. They were bad enough in ones, he didn't need this shit. 

*

There wasn't much more Stiles could do now. He told Derek what he meant to tell him, and the rest was up to the alpha. He hoped it would go differently than that, He knew he wouldn't be forgiven on an instant, but he did hope that Derek would at least give him a chance, let him in a little bit, so he could earn their trust again. But apparently it's not how it works, apparently you only have one chance to take what a werewolf wants to give you, and there is no coming back. Even if you are just eighteen years old and way to young for that kind of commitment. Like seriously, couldn't Derek just ask him out like normal person? Of course not, he had to ask him for a life long commitment at the beginning, because that's how Derek works. And Stiles kind of understands that. Derek was broken in so many ways, that he fought hard to protect what was still whole in him. Still it was unfair what he asked from Stiles. Stiles who wanted to get away from this town all his life, who wanted to do something with his life that was bigger than community college and mediocre job. And he wanted Derek, of course he did, but this, this was too much for him than. If he agreed he wouldn't be able to leave Derek's side for this long, and Derek couldn't leave Beacon hills as an alpha of the pack without someone trying to cause troubles and maybe change the borders a little bit. Now though, now was a different story. He left to do his big thing, he got to see the word outside, and he knew there was nothing he could ever want more then what he had left behind. He meant what he said to Derek, he didn't regret leaving, if he didn't he would never be this sure, he would always regret not being this sure, and he would always wonder about other things, only to become bitter. Sometimes he envied werewolves. It was so easy for them, when it came to those things, you go where your pack goes and that's what make you happiest. But of course there were also uncontrollable shifts and killing rabbits, which was decidedly less fun. 

Stiles tried to distract himself from thinking about all of that for the rest of the day. He reconnected tenderly with his old xbox for long hours before his eyes started to stinge so he decided it's a good time to take a break. He even called Alice and listened to her complaining about everything her family did wrong since she got back for good half an hour. He was a good friend like that. He had to stop her though in the middle of a long story about how her brother was being a dick, when he heard a loud crash coming from his room. He quickly said his goodbyes to dissatisfied Alice and hurried upstairs to asses the damages. He found Scott looking at him sheepishly from the floor where he was sitting next to his now broken chair. Stiles was mildly impressed.

'How?' He asked conversationally 

'It wasn't there before.' Scott whined standing up.

'Sure buddy.' Stiles agreed generously. Choosing to half lie on his bed, since there was no other sitting options in the room now. He will make Scott buy him new one though. He's an unemployed college graduate after all, he can't be expected to buy himself furniture on his own. Especially when it was broken by a poor excuse for supernatural being. 'So, what can I do for you?'

'You were at Derek's today.'

'Yeah. I was.'

'I think he was angry. He always pushes us harder when his angry.'

'He probably was.' 

Scott was looking at him like he was sorry, and Stiles hated it. He never wanted people to be sorry for him. Not when his mother died and definitely not now.

'It didn't go well.' He offered nevertheless. 'It doesn't matter.' 

'Of course it does. Derek is an idiot.'

Stiles shook his head. 'No. It's just so complicated' 

'It's not. You needed time, you're back, you want him, he'll never want anybody else. What's complicated about that?'

Stiles was often amazed at his best friends ability to look at things like they are so... simple. In Scott's world there barely ever were any grays. It was refreshing, even if sometimes irritating. 

'I hurt him.'

Scott shrugged 'People hurt each other. He should get over himself.'

'It wasn't always easy between you and Allison either.'

'No.' Scott agreed easily 'But the person you are hurting the most when you push your mate away is yourself.'

'He always was kind of a masochist.'

Scott laughed at that and went to lie on the bad beside Stiles, making him feel worm. He certainly missed how tactile werewolves were, Scott especially. Adam never let him cuddle, Stiles pouted at the thought of those conversations alone, Adam used to say it was weird for two adult men to cuddle. He clearly knew nothing about simple joys of life.

*

He was kind of expecting a visit from someone from the pack, a _threatening_ visit most probably, since they had to notice he went to talk to their alpha. He was getting jumpy from all those nerves, this couldn't be healthy. What he did not expect however was an invitation.

'What?' He asked looking at Scott dumbly. 

'6 pm, Derek's place. pack meeting.' Scott punctuated giving Stiles a look he knew very well. It was his look, he used to give it to Scott all the time in high school, which rude. Scott was not allowed to use his own look against him, especially when it's totally justifiable to be a little slow on the uptake.

'And he actually told you to invite me?' He had to make sure, wouldn't want to show up just to be thrown right back out by an angry werewolf. They can throw far. Stiles know that for a fact, because his life is just that kind of awesome. 

'Yeah' Scott nodded enthusiastically 'It won't be a real pack meeting anyway, more like a hang out.' 

'A hang out with a bunch of people who can't stand me, that's gonna be great.' Stiles muttered sarcastically. He was obviously happy at this turn of events, cause that had to mean Derek was at least considering forgiving him, right? But to be thrown right away into werewolves den? Quite literally one might add. He hoped that at least he would tell his betas to not eat him when he comes.

'It _is_ gonna be great.' Scott insisted with his easy optimism. Stiles really wished he was right.

*

He decided to get a ride with Scott and Allison, he was willing to sacrifice bits of his sanity he was loosing every time he had to listen to them flirt with each other, in order to not arrive alone. 

This time nobody's standing on the porch when they pull up on the driveway, and Stiles is thankful for that. His contemplating just getting back to the car and locking himself in, but Allison, who usually seem to understand his mood better than Scott, put an arm around his waist squishing reassuringly while pushing him forward at the same time. Stiles devotes few seconds to marvel how strong she actually is, but it gives him gross pictures of his best friend's sex life he so drops that line of thinking surprisingly fast. He got pushed inside the house in no time and it looked as cozy inside as it seemed from outside. The walls were light brown, complimenting the wood on the floor, whole house smelled of food and he could hear people laughing carelessly in the leaving room. It felt lived-in and better than Stiles ever imagined it, when the renovation started, it made his heart clench that he wasn't there to see it happen. 

Allison stirred him in the direction of the living room ignoring his feeble protest completely. Scott had already ran there with a goofy grin on his face. 

'Relax' She murmured to him quietly. 'They won't bite.'

'You can't actually promise that.' Stiles felt the need to protest, but she just laughed warmly.

It seemed that everybody was already there, which was good, because he would get over it faster, but on the other hand, he's got them all at once. They stop talking when he walks in and Stiles marvels silently how much older they look. They matured during those years for sure, there's no room for awkward teenage phrase anymore, they look comfortable, confident. It's a good look on them and once again Stiles regrets he missed all that.

'Hey' He greets them awkwardly, since it's clear they aren't going to talk first. He can see Scott smiling at him reassuringly, but he can also see Erica glaring at him from the couch an Isaac snarling. He can clearly feel the love. At least Lydia cuffed Isaac in the head to make him stop, he decided to take that as a good sign. Stiles would take what he can get at this point, even violence, when it's not directed at him. He sits on the floor next to Scott, thinking frantically of a thing to say, which honestly shouldn't be that hard, he has plenty to say when there's no need for it.

'So...Nice seeing you again?' Stiles offered with a nervous smile. He was admittedly surprised when it was Lydia who huffed and smiled at him.

'It is, you grew up well.' She eyed him appreciatively, which earned her a glares from the rest of pack, but why would Lydia Martin care about that? Stiles doubted even Derek could stop her from saying and doing whatever she wanted. He was glad that right now it was in his favor, even though he would probably learn to curse it in times.

'You did too' He returned the smile gratefully 'All of you.' 

Scott elbowed him I 'see it's not that bad' gesture, that Stiles would appreciate more if it wasn't that hard.

'Derek will be done with food soon, you can put in a movie' Allison announced from the kitchen, where she disappeared as soon as she pushed Stiles to his doom.

'Derek cooks?' Stiles couldn't hide his surprise at that, he should figure it out on his own if you think about it, since the alpha was the only one missing from the room, but Derek cooking was not something he ever imagined happening in real life. Maybe there were a few fantasies before that involved Derek and apron, but there was never any hope in him to that anything like that was actually going to happen.

'Yeah' Scott confirmed 'It's strange, but everything he makes is actually delicious.'

And yeah, he had that slightly dazed of expression he always wore when thinking about delicious, greasy food. Stiles knows this expression very well, he's fond of that expression.

He let them argue about the movie themselves not wanting to get involved in another argument. At least in this matter little had changed over time – Lydia still wanted to watch some overly sappy romance supported in her efforts by Erica, while Allison and Isaac voted for something with more violence. Scott still agreed with whatever Allison wanted, and Boyd simply judged them all silently. 

Seriously the guy was a master of silent but strong opinions. Luckily for Stiles romance was outvoted so there was two hours of mindless violence ahead of him.

Derek emerged from the kitchen just when they put the DVD on, Stiles had a strong suspicion he was waiting, listening in for when it was safe to come out. He was never able to understand the passion with witch they argued about movies. It was strangely endearing. And the food he had smelled even better when it was closer. And the vision helped as well. There was enough food to feed like a small village, but most probably it would all be gone before the evening is over. That was actually what Stiles envied werewolves the most, ability to eat enormous amounts of food without any effect. There were moments in his life, he's not the most proud of when he half-seriously considered becoming a werewolf just so could eat some more. Looking at what Derek had cooked he thought this probably would be one of those nights.

Evening was strange for Stiles. Derek barely paid any attention to him, and said maybe five words to him altogether. The only people who actually talk to him quite normally was Scott and Allison obviously and also Lydia in her own way. But at least they weren't hostile which was an improvement in itself. He will be able to work with that if they allow him to come back again and not throw him out the door with 'never come back' card. It still felt good being back among them, they were still his family even if they didn't considered him that way anymore. It was just nice, listening to them talk and argue, learning all the ways they changed while he wasn't looking. Even though it also made him sad every time he realized there was something that changed, when it was hitting him that he wasn't there. If you asked him which movie did they watch Stiles wouldn't be able to tell. He was too focused on other stuff to pay attention to that on top of everything.

It was well into the night when they started to leave. Erica was the first to go, saying she has to work in the morning, she took Boyd with her and shouted ' See you, Stilinski' when she was almost out the door. Issac left the room not long after even though he was actually only going upstairs since he was living with Derek now. Somehow it didn't come as a surprise to Stiles. 

It got a bit more uncomfortable after that with the way Derek still practically ignored Stiles' presence, so he tried discreetly give a sign to Scott that maybe they should be going too, but obviously discretion never worked with Scott. Neither it worked for Stiles to be honest, but whatever. They left finally together with Lydia, who invited Stiles for coffee the next day before they parted. She said she wanted to talk to him about a job, which Stiles jumped on, because really there is only that long he can go without doing something before he goes insane. Also he probably should stop living off his dad. 

He didn't actually know why he stopped being friends with Lydia too after the whole thing went down, she was not a werewolf so he didn't have the same instincts as the rest of them. He blamed it mostly on the fact they were never close before. Their friendship was always more coincidental allies then actual friendship. Especially since Jackson left. Lydia didn't really hang out with the pack after that, she helped them when there was need for that, but no casual stuff. Apparently that was another thing that changed. 

 

*

When he was waiting for Lydia to show up the following day, because of course she would be fashionably late, he started thinking how excited his 16-year old self would be in that position. Then he would probably be vibrating out of his skin, now he was just slightly exasperated by her tardiness. It was funny how completely his ideal changed from strawberry blond hair and soft skin to black stubble and firm muscle. He always went for extremes, he wouldn't know how to stay in the middle. 

Lydia finally showed up waking him up from his thoughts by simply placing a fresh cup of coffee in front of him, as he long finished his first one. He didn't even ask how she knew what to order for him. 

'So?' He prompted her. 'You said job. I need job'

'I figured' She said taking a sip of her own drink and wincing slightly. 'They never make it right.' She complained and Stiles smiled fondly. 

'There will be a free position in the library if you want it' She finally stated after few more moments of complaining about her coffee. 'They didn't announced that yet, but there always is a lot of people interested. There's not much to do here for historians on English graduates as you probably already noticed.'

'Yeah' It was his turn to wince. He did notice. 'How do you know about it though. Somehow I doubt you would be interested.'

'I have my sources. Anyway you can have the job'

'Just like that?'

'It's not much, but it's better then nothing isn't it?' She looked at him and smirked 'Especially if you want to show someone how serious you are about staying.'

'I don't know whether I hate you or love you'

'Oh, you love me.' She answered with conviction, and Stiles knew she absolutely believes that. She was probably right too. 

'Fine. I want it'

'Knew you would' She smiled sweetly. 'Be there tomorrow at nine. And loose the t-shirt, you are supposed to at least pretend to be professional.'

'Hey!' Stiles yelled indignantly. His t-shirts were cool and not even Lydia could convince him otherwise. They talk about everything else after that. About what Lydia is up to now (She's working in a big chemical company an hour away from Beacon Hills, and she looks happy about it, even though it's not NASA or anything), about how much she is completely over Jackson after all those years, even though Stiles doesn't believe that for a second and highly doubts she's not keeping in touch with him still. Even though he's not coming back. They talk about Stiles too. How was college for him, about the people he met. She keeps telling him he looks much better now, all grown up, and he would lie if he said he's not pleased by that. Lydia's compliments will always hold a special place in his heart, even if he's not in love with her anymore. It's still Lydia after all. They talk about the rest of the pack too, but Lydia is much more secretive about those topics, just like Scott used to be every time they talked on the phone. She doesn't tell him much, except what they are all doing now, and that he mostly knew already anyway. They still spent two hours just talking, honestly he didn't expected Lydia to dedicate that much time to him. She always made it well known exactly how much of a busy woman she is, so to not wast her time. She did eventually inform him that she's already late and needs to go right in that moment.

'But there's a party at my place at Friday. Make sure to appear, will you?' She said over her shoulder as a goodbye. Like Stiles would ever say no to that. He spent half his time at high school trying to get invited to one of those. 

*

Stiles did loose his t-shirt the next morning though. He can introduce his bosses to the awesomeness of his clothing choices after he will convince them not to fire him on the spot. After all he only has this job because of Lydia and not his own abilities, he still needs to prove his actually capable. Even though it's only handing people their books, they are unable to find on their own. His pretty sure he hadn't been this nervous since the first day of high school, which is saying something since it was probably the most stressful day of his life. Nothing in his college carrier could ever compare. 

He arrived half an hour earlier than he was expected and panicked in his car for ten minutes before going in. His first day at work started quite well. His boss was a surprisingly nice man considering he had to know Lydia good enough for her to ask him favors. The tour around the place didn't really take much time since Beacon Hills library was as small as small was the whole town. It had it's fair share of books of any kind but it wasn't nearly as big as any of the library's he frequented while studying. Stiles always had a sentiment for it though. He used to spent long hours here huddled up in some corner after his mothers death. Every time he felt like escaping the world for a while he would come here and just read. Sometimes he wouldn't even care what book to choose, he would just take one at random and start reading, whatever it was about. Sometimes he liked them, sometimes he didn't and stopped after some pages to find something else that could give him the escape he needed. At that time all of the workers knew his name and book taste. He tended to rattle about his latest fascinations to whoever was close enough to hear him. In time he stopped coming quite that often, but he was pretty sure there was at least Mrs. Addams, who still remembered him. She used to give him mints every time she spotted him when at work. She was his favorite person for ever for a long time just for that. Also because she actually seemed to like listening to him talk for hours. He pondered for a moment how weird it was going to be to work with her now. Somehow he couldn't imagine her ever seeing him as an actual, capable grown up. She was just one of those women who keep you in their minds as a little kid till your forty and getting bald. 

After the tour Stiles got introduced to Elaine, who looks like she's in her thirties and is pretty cool. Stiles is supposed to work with her today, just to see what it look likes so he doesn't do anything stupid when left alone. There aren't many people in and Elaine tell him it's usually like this.

'It's a bit busier during school year, especially at the and of it, I'm sure you remember how that is' She smiles at him devilishly. 'But mostly it's rather lazy here.' 

'All you really have to know is how to find anything people may ask about. And recommend something when they don't know what they want.' 

'That doesn't sound too hard.' Stiles agrees. 

'It's not.' She shrugs 'If you wanted an exciting job you should probably look for something else.'

'Nah, I have enough excitements in my life as it is.' He says easily. 'Besides even this job I only managed to snatch because of a friend. There's nor much an English graduate can do around here.' 

She nods in agreement, before launching into gossiping about everybody else who works in this place. Stiles is kind of impressed, Elaine clearly likes to talk, probably she could out talk him even. It also makes him feel a bit competitive, but he generously lets her talk for now. He does want to know after all. And yes Mrs. Addams still works here. Elaine laughs for fifteenth minutes when he tells her why he asked. All in all his first day at work is much more boring than he expected. Until Derek enters that is. 

Stiles straightens as soon as he sees him walking through the door. Elaine catches the change in him and turns to look what got him so tense.

'Oh, he's here often.'

'Yeah?' Stiles gulped. 

'Yeah, he reads a lot. Pretty and smart, some people are just lucky, aren't they?' She signed dreamily and Stiles has half a mind to tell that Derek really isn't all that lucky, but stops himself. Somehow he doubts the alpha would appreciate him discussing his personal life with strangers, especially so since most of his problem are supernatural related. 

Derek comes to the counter with a firm frown on his face.

'What are you doing here?' 

'Hello to you too'

'Stiles'

'I work here, dude. What do you think I'm doing?'

'You work here?' Derek's surprise is visible, and Stiles wonders whether or not he should be offended.

'Yeah, Lydia helped.' He shrugs aiming for nonchalance. 'It's not like I can live off my father for ever.'

'Lydia' Derek grits his teeth.

'Oh, you aren't going to be mad at her for her for that, are you?'

Derek just looks at him, face blank and say 'No. I see you Friday.' before heading out.

'Hey, you didn't even rent anything!' Stiles shouts after him, because really who comes to the library with a sole purpose of intimidating the staff members. Derek doesn't turn around though. Instead Stiles gets to explain to Elaine how exactly he knows Derek. She demands grate detail too. Apparently Stiles is out of practice with making up stories, it takes him much more panicked thinking than it used to. He should probably work on that again sometime.

*

Rest of the week went in pretty much the same pattern. At least now he has a reason to get up in the morning, so he doesn't sleep till midday. He also starts looking for his own place to life. It was nice to stay with his father for a couple of days but he can't stay there forever, and now he actually has a job that can pay rent. A small one, but still. He doesn't have much luck, but he only just started, he didn't expect to find anything liveable immediately. Scott tried to help, but he was hopeless at this. Stiles had to ask him how did he actually managed to find an acceptable place for him and Allison to live in if that's how he goes round to it. Scott smiled sheepishly and admitted it was all Allison doing, because he refused to even enter any of the places he had found. Stiles really didn't blame her. Work was pretty much as boring as Elaine promised it would be. At least he has time to actually read books that he likes again. He had fallen behind on that. Mrs. Addams almost pinched his cheeks when they first see each other. Stiles was oddly touched by that.

Obviously when Lydia called to ask how was the work, he told her it was everything he ever dreamed of and more. She didn't seem to believe him, but at the same time she sounded pleased that he found it appropriate to try to lie to her about that. As a goodby she threatens him with bodily harm if he doesn't show up for the party. Stiles is oddly touched by that too, which worries him for a second before he decides he's trying to get on the good side of the werewolves pack, so what he find touching is the least unusual thing is his life. 

And of course Stiles wouldn't even dream of not showing up. He does spent a lot of time he is happy to never speak of, ever, trying on pretty much every piece of clothing that he own in different combinations though. Logically he knows it doesn't really matter since those people had seen him beaten and covered in blood that not always belonged to him in the first place, but he still has it his mind the thought that he should at least try look impressive. Especially since it's not only pack that's going to be there and if he doesn't look up to standard he's going to stand out and not in the good way. Unfortunately a standard was pretty high whenever Lydia Martin was concerned. Also Derek's gonna been there. 

As it turns out he doesn't actually remember all that much from the party. He wakes up in his own bed, his head aching with pain that he is somewhat familiar with after four years of college, but that doesn't make it any more of a pleasant experience. He tries to stand up and get some painkillers but he only manages to half sit before he decades it's probably a bad idea and lie back down trying to summon the pills by force, or whatever. He also tries to recall how he actually ended up here, but all he remembers from last night is his arrival. There were many painfully good looking people there, some of theme he even got introduced to by Lydia herself. But after that she also offered him a drink and that's where his suffering brain stops cooperating. He groans burrowing deeper into the sheets in attempt to escape from sunlight and mentally prepares himself for few possibly mentally scarring phone calls that he's going to have to make in order to determine whether he has to flee the city or not. He really wish he doesn't. He was starting to like it here again. 

It took Stiles another two hours to crawl out of bed and trail into kitchen. When his father was. Drinking coffee. Stiles threw himself on a chair with a pathetic whine, but his father didn't appear very sympathetic, actually he looked more amused than concerned. Stiles thought they should have nice, long conversation about parenting and love for an only son a man should have, but probably they should have it another time. After he inhale a lot of coffee for starters. And maybe some greasy delicious food. And manage to keep it down, which doesn't seem so obvious at the moment.

'Tough night?' Sheriff asked. Stiles groaned in response lying his head on the table. 'It certainly looked like that when Derek brought you here last night' His father continued uncaring for his sons suffering. Seriously, long talk. But also 

'Derek brought me here?' Stiles jerked his had to more vertical position, not a good idea as it turned out. Sheriff raised an eyebrow 'Well, don't you remember?'

'Daad' Stiles whined, Sheriff just looked more amused.

'He did. Tucked you in bad and everything.' 

'Seriously?' 

'Yep. I'm going to work, let you suffer alone.' He patted Stiles' back on his way out, but he also put a painkiller in front of him, so Stiles decided he maybe wasn't as bad father as he had already decided he was. He swallowed it gratefully while already ringing Scott, because really Derek tucking him in? He certainly needed to hear about that as soon as possible.

'Yeah' Scott sounded way too awake for Stiles' liking, it just wasn't fair.

'Scott' He whined to the phone 'What did I do?'

Scott laughed. He laughed long enough for Stiles to start reconsidering his choice in friends. Probably he should find new ones. More sympathetic with his pain.

'Scott, come on'

'Sorry' Scott answered breathless.'Don't worry. Everything's fine'

'No it's not. I don't remember like anything. And apparently Derek drove me home, which I'm all for and everything, but he wasn't all that friendly the last time I saw him and now his _tucking me_ _in_?'

'Yeah, about that, he got a bit possessive. Wouldn't let anyone else do that.'

'why?'

'There might have been a guy who got a little bit too friendly with you and he might have growled at him in a manner that probably scarred the guy for life, and you might have clinged to Derek afterward calling him your hero, and asking if you can get married now that he rescued you from the villain.'

Stiles let out another groan. Seriously, Stiles? 

'So I do have to move after all.'

'No, I'm pretty sure he rather liked it actually. No idea why would he, but you know, he was always weird.'

'Yeah. Well thanks, but if you don't mind I'm gonna go die in peace now.'

'Sure, buddy.'

Stiles hung up and crawled back upstairs with firm resolve to vegetate in bed couple more hours, till his basic life functions return to him. The problem was someone was sitting on his bad. He was too hung-overed for any kind of sudden movements so he refrained from jerking back in surprise.

'Derek.' He stated looking at his guest, while slowly realizing that he probably heard their entire conversation. Well, that's his own fault and Stiles is not going to care. 'How nice of you to drop by. Unfortunately I won't be much use with entertaining guests right now but your welcomed to do whatever it was you came here to do.'

'I came to see if you are alright' Derek looks uncomfortable saying it.

'I'm fine, or I'm gonna be when I'm done dying. Anyway, apparently I have you to thank, so thanks.'

Derek grunted in response and looked away, he never learned how to respond to gratitude in any form. Even if it from the pack.

'I'll come back when you feel better.' Derek made a move to stand up, but Stiles felt like he had to keep him there somehow, like he just couldn't let him eave now when they seemed to finally be kind of fine.

'No!' He shouted probably a bit too loud, it made his headache worse, he really couldn't wait for the pills to finally start doing their thing. 'You should stay. You know, make sure I don't hurt myself or whatever' He added quieter.

'I really hope there is no need to look after you in your own bedroom.'

'Um, yeah, I'll probably be fine.' Stiles winced at his own awkwardness. 'Unless Lydia find me and murder me for causing a scene at her party.'

'That was my fault' Derek looked kind of sheepish, which was cute but Stiles wasn't crazy enough to say that to him. 'I overreacted.'

'But you are harder to kill. And I don't mind that you did. Overreact. I'm kind of happy about that to be honest. Cause hey, at least you care or something.'

Derek looked at him sharply and Stiles was scared he said something wrong and managed to screw it up like he usually did one way or another.

'Of course I care.' Derek said at least. 'You know that'

'Yeah I do. It's just...' He flailed his hand around in aborted motion 'You don't even talk to me now. Even on that pack meeting you barely spoke few words to me. And I don't know what to do.'

Derek looked like he wanted to say something in respond, but he closed his mouth almost as soon as he opened him, shaking his head. Stiles was scared of what he might want to say.

'We will talk about when you feel better.' Derek said finally, decisively and stood up before Stiles could protest. 'You should go to bed now, sleep it off.' 

'Like you know how to cure hangover' Stiles scoffed, as if he was going to do something different before Derek interrupted him by appearing on his bed. He most certainly didn't envy werewolves their inability to get even slightly tipsy, but he tended to forget that he doesn't in the mornings after. 

'You think I never had a hangover.' Derek raised an eyebrow at him amused 'Just because I didn't tell a bunch of teenagers who cause me enough troubles when sober how to do that doesn't yet mean it's impossible.' 

Stiles gaped at him, shocked and out of words. Derek started laughing and Stiles realized his mouth was hanging open. He closed it with a click. Derek shot him one last smile before jumping out of the window with 'See you, Stiles.' 

Stiles had half mind to call Scott immediately to tell him what Derek been hiding from them all those years, he even reached for a phone, but changed his mind before he managed to choose a number. He was too tired for that conversation, beside he wanted to see their faces when they find out they forced abstinence was actually unnecessary. As long as Derek was telling the truth, he should probably check that somehow before sanding his way a bunch of angry teenagers. For now he chose to simple curl up in his sheets again. Maybe he wasn't feeling much better than when he first got up, but somehow he felt much lighter inside. 

*

When he finally felt better it was already good into the afternoon, as he spend most of the day with a half-asleep daze. Sheriff was still at work and after a good, hot shower and some food Stiles decided to go out. Coffee shop was calling to his soul with a promise of delicious over-priced caffeine and he was a sucker for that brand of calling. Beside fresh air would do him some good.

In the coffee shop however he immediately spotted a head of messy curls that couldn't belong to anyone else than Isaac Lahey. He was perched in far corner of the room crouched over stack of papers. Stiles knew from what Scott had been telling him that Isaac recently begin to attend community college apart from his work at the call center after the whole pack joined in the effort to convince him it was worth it. Stiles' first instinct when confronted with an expression of sheer hopelessness that Isaac was currently spouting was to come over and help. He made a move to do just that but stopped abruptly after only few steps. Last encounter with Isaac in the same coffee shop didn't go so well and even if the werewolf wasn't aggressive when they met again ay Derek's he wasn't exactly friendly either and Stiles still didn't know weather or not his presence would be welcomed. He stood for a while undecided but a quite frankly pathetic groan from the werewolf made him decide to take the risk. He was a sucker was pure misery, what can one do. Isaac didn't seem to notice his presence till he announced himself with loud throat cleaning which caused Isaac to jerk violently with terrified expression. Stiles had to stifle a laugh. He never thought he would live to see a day when he manage to sneak up on a werewolf. Even if there wasn't much sneaking up involved this time either.

'You look really sad so I was wondering if you needed some help or whatever.' Isaac eyed him suspiciously like he proposed something illegal in at least half the states. He let out a defeated sigh 'It's just an English essay for class that I have no idea what to do with.' He admitted quietly

'Well than you are lucky to have bumped into an English major aren't you buddy?' Stiles announced cheerfully taking a sit opposite from Isaac who still didn't look entirely convinced it's a good idea.

'I did not bump into you.' He announce finally even though he already let Stiles take control over all of the papers. Stiles waved his hand dismissively not averting his eyes from the text 'Semantics' 

Isaac rolled his eyes which action Stiles happily ignored. 'I can totally help you with that'

' Yeah?' Isaac eyes lit up with long abandoned hope and Stiles couldn't help but smile a little in response 'Yeah.'

They worked together for over two hours Stiles explaining everything one needed to know to write an insightful paper and Isaac listening with surprising eagerness and taking notes of what to include and what's better left out. When Stiles was finally confident that that his student would be good to he made a move to say his goodbyes, he didn't want to overstay his welcome and break the fragile truce he had apparently earned by providing with useful knowledge. Isaac stopped him though.

'You didn't even had coffee yet. It's on me I owe you for that.' This caught Stiles well off guard

'Oh, no it's okay. I'm good.' Isaac smiled at him devilishly 'I'm pretty sure you could use some free coffee after last night.' Stiles groaned letting his head fall on the table with a soft thud. 'We are not talking about that, ever.' Isaac just laughed leaving the table to fetch their drinks. He returned couple minutes later and as much as Stiles' preferred order wasn't complicated since it was just plain coffee with a splash of milk he was surprised Isaac didn't even ask and still brought him just that. They sat few minutes in silence that surprisingly wasn't uncomfortable nor awkward before Isaac blurted suddenly 'You aren't going to leave this time, are you?' Stiles was a little taken aback both by the question itself because he didn't expect him to be so blunt but also by the tone in which it was asked. Isaac sounded so small and shy, Stiles didn't hear him be like that in ages, he couldn't say he particularly missed it.

'Of course not. I'll let as long as I won't get thrown out.'

Isaac shook his head.'You know he's not gonna do that. But you can't break his heart again. It was bad enough last time.'

'I never meant to break his heart.' It never stopped him from feeling guilty for doing just that.

'I know. But still. It's mostly why we were so angry at you, you know? We could feel his pain through the bond and it was coming back every time _you_ were back. Isaac wasn't looking at him, his gaze fixed firmly at the cup in his hand.

'I'm sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen'

'But you did rejected him than.'

'I just needed some time to do normal human stuff, but I always wanted to be with him. And he would know that too if he ever bother to actually listen to everything I had to say.'

Isaac smiled sad;y. 'He's as bad at listening as he is at talking. But he got better I guess. A little'

'I did too, hopefully.''After last night I don''t think he's angry at you any more, anyway.' Isaac smile turned teasing, and only slightly mean 'you were clinging to him like an octopus while professing your undying affection after all.'

Stiles groaned helplessly. He seriously doubted any of this would be forgotten in a very long time, but on the other hand if that's the price he has to pay for getting Derek back than it's not high a price at all. 'I heard I proposed.' Isaac almost spilled his coffee laughing and nodded 

'Yeah, that was fun. Especially Derek's face. He looked like he was going to get aneurysm' 

Stiles winced 'How mad Lydia is?' He asked . He was a bit concerned about his job, he was pretty sure that if he got Lydia mad enough she would get him fired just as quickly as quickly she got him hired, Isaac just shook his head though 'Don't worry about her, she looked quite pleased actually.'

'Seriously?' Stiles would sooner believe that aliens landed in Beacon Hills than that Lydia Martin was pleased somebody cased a potentially supernatural scene at her party. Apparently that gave you a bad reputation if your guest couldn't behave properly. She gave him a long lecture on that topic at least twice before. Also aliens would be possibly way cooler, unless they wanted to kill everybody with advanced weaponry. Okay, so he got a bit of track, but what was Isaac there for.

'I guess it will just speed things along. We all would like for the drama to end.' He jerked his head after finishing that sentence to look Stiles in the eye with a bit worried expression 'You are going to talk to him about that, aren't you?'

'Sure. He came by this morning, but you know, I was busy dying so he said we'll talk when I fell better.'

Isaac nodded satisfied with that answer 'Good, maybe he'll finally stop brooding so much when you two start fucking.'

He laughed at Stiles' indignant yelp. Or maybe just on the fact he managed to spill remaining coffee all over himself.

*

 

he had whole weekend off so he drove down to Derek's the next morning. He was almost as nervous as when he made that road for the first time. Today at least he had an advantage of knowing that Derek probably will talk to him without a fight, but that gave also a lot of new opportunities to somehow fuck it all up. What if again he will say something that 

Derek will understand in a way it was not intended to and everything will be even worse than before? That's what created this whole mess after all. He had every right to be nervous. Derek was not waiting outside this time when Stiles pulled up, so he devoted additional ten minutes for silent freak out fully aware that Derek heard his jeep from a distance and surely knows that Stiles is sitting there. Yet he let him in without a word when Stiles finally gathered his courage and lead him to the living room. Stiles wanted to start talking, to say anything that would break that silence but something in Derek’s expression made him shut up and wait. 

Finally Derek sighed and began to speak. And Stiles never would have thought that this is what he was going to hear. 'I understand why you had to leave. I know that you think that I don't but really, I do. And I shouldn't be so mad at you for it' Stiles was stunned into silence. He wanted to say a million things, like than why was you? But he couldn't get a coherent word out. Derek ran a hand through his hair with a frustrated nose and continued. ' I wasn't mad because you left, I was mad because I was scared. It felt like if I wont get you to say yes to me than, if I let you leave I'll never be able to have you. That you will understand that this kind of life is too little for you and you won't ever want to come back. That's why I was so angry when you decided to leave anyway. It felt like I already lost you and it felt like that more and more with every day you didn't come back even if I knew it was my anger that was keeping you away. But I didn't allow myself to feel anything else because I was sure you won't really want to come back to me after college. I was sure there would be somewhere, someone better for you. And now you are here' Derek only looked at Stiles now he looked frustrated even more than before 'You're here and you're getting a job and looking for apartments and fucking proposing to me even if it's only when you're drunk. And I can't be mad anymore.'

'Than maybe you should give me a chance to prove you that there will never be anyone better for me instead.' Stiles said carefully through completely dry throat. 'Prove that there really isn't anywhere I would rather be.'

'You know what I want Stiles.' Derek was looking at him with hunger in his eyes that made Stiles stomach do things it probably should never do. 

'I do. And if you asked me now I would say yes.'

Derek was suddenly suddenly way closer than before pinning Stiles to the living room wall with his whole body, burrowing his face into Stiles' neck. Stiles let him do it, let Derek's instincts be satisfied and soon he felt Derek turning his head to start kissing his neck all the way up to the jaw and than alongside until he reach the lips. When that finally happened Stiles was already writhing underneath him helplessly ready for so much more. Derek didn't let it progress far though. Despite Stiles' vocal but even if not exactly coherent protest he disentangled himself from the embrace when Stiles' hands found their way under Derek's shirt. He smiled at Stiles' whining, with that happy smile that Stiles didn't see at all for the last years, but still distanced himself after one last kiss. 

'Later.' He promised. 'Erica's coming over soon. You wouldn't want her to see that now, would you?'

'I'm sure she would be delighted.' Stiles grumbled fussily.

'Probably' Derek agreed easily ' But I don't share well.'

Stiles laughed at that obvious possessiveness, surely he could see himself cursing all werewolfy instincts in general and that one in particular in near future, but right in that moment he couldn't bring himself to mind. 

'Also if you are looking places to live you should just move in. I doubt we're really gonna need to bed' Derek added over his shoulder when leaving the room to venture into the kitchen as if it was nor a big deal. And probably it wasn't for him as Stiles practically just accepted to be his mate and that was kind of forever deal anyway, but it left Stiles gaping for good fie minutes before he shook it off enough to shakily shout back 'I hope that's a promise!'

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not actually very happy with that ending, but I first started writing this three months ago and I finally got fed up and decided to just post it like it is.  
> Constructive criticism is much appreciated.  
> Also I'm on tumblr as werewolvesintardis.


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